“Sapphire’s dad is a better person than me.” I said from my seat as passenger. “Maybe I have already broken the cycle of abuse. Maybe I have already given my daughter a different life because her dad is so good.”
My boyfriend was thoughtful, “I am glad that Sapphire has a great dad Amber, but that does not make him more important and that does not make him better.”
It did though, I sat there in the despair of knowing that if I had to score us separately he would win. My daughter has the best dad on the planet. My boyfriend could tell that I was trying to lose. He didn’t allow it. “Does your ex-husband work harder than you?” He asked.
“No,” my heart answered. “I have always needed to work harder.”
He continued, smiling, reaching out for my hand, “Does he help more people than you do Amber…”
I was instantly worthy, my mouth turning up as my spirit lifted. “No, he doesn’t help more people than me.” I said out loud.
He was gorgeous sitting there beside me. I wished for forever in that moment. He gave it to me, “Does he love her more than you do?”
I was near to tears, some happy, some sad, “No. There isn’t anyone who could possibly love her more than me. She is every dream I have ever had. She is every good thing wrapped as a little person. No one could possibly love her more, but I want them to try.”