I woke to the sound of rain on roof top and it was welcome. The rain was a welcome distraction from too many thoughts, all of which have requirements of action, a need to follow through.

“When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.”


I wish I had Confucius for a teacher, but his time was before my time. He is said to have lived in the era of ancient philosophy, 551–479 BC. I’m wondering about time now. I am wondering if Confucius felt rushed, pressed to make time fit into an extraordinary life. I am also questioning the value of my own independent thought. How do my ideas compare to his? If I were to begin to study now, could my thoughts evolve to the ovation of national sanction?

“Following the victory of Han over Chu after the collapse of Qin, Confucius’s thoughts received official sanction and were further developed into a system known as Confucianism.”

confucius 5

I’m chuckling, as I imagine myself standing in front of a sea of onlookers, addressing our nation with a demand, “Now that it has been established that I have a firm grasp of reason, and by official mandate, YOU MUST NOT CALL ME CRAZY.”

Nearly everyone I know calls me crazy and it is usually with kindness and it always hurts. People go out of their way to tell me how much they admire my strength and courage for sharing my sometimes disagreeable truth. “You put it all out there Amber.  I love that you don’t care what people think. You are my favorite kind of crazy.”

The very statement offends my soul. Of course I care what people think. It is absolutely ludicrous that some people believe that I am so steadfast in my identity that I can’t be moved to question it, or be willed to conform or assimilate. CRAZY?

Did you really just tell me that after reading the collection of my life reflection that your summary grasp is that I am nothing more than the ramblings of someone with a sick mind? Crazy is a person sick in the head. How is that ever a compliment? Our use of language is back-handed until we need to redefine it by lengthy explanation. “I didn’t mean it that way!”

Eckhart Tolle writes that we are not our thoughts, and so does some psychology chic I found when I Googled to find his direct quote. Her article is called, “Why our thoughts are not real.” I will include the link in case you would like to read the ideas of Dr. Nancy Colier. (CLICK HERE)

If you do go on to read her work, please do so while replaying her assumptive title over and over in your mind. “Her thoughts are not real either.”

I believe that we become the identity of our repeated ideas and that the things we say to each other in communication is a part of that claymation.  I say repeated because some ideas are fleeting and barely there, so light that even impression does not apply. I also believe that a word is an identity of intent, not to be used interchangeably as ‘SAME’.  Let’s make the comparison of these two words: thought and idea. Which word holds more power?

  1. IDEA: In philosophy, ideas are usually construed as mental representational images of some object. Ideas can also be abstract concepts that do not present as mental images.[1] Many philosophers have considered ideas to be a fundamental ontological category of being. The capacity to create and understand the meaning of ideas is considered to be an essential and defining feature of human beings. In a popular sense, an idea arises in a reflexive, spontaneous manner, even without thinking or serious reflection, for example, when we talk about the idea of a person or a place.

  2. THOUGHT: Can refer to the ideas or arrangements of ideas that result from thinking, the act of producing thoughts, or the process of producing thoughts. Although thought is a fundamental human activity familiar to everyone, there is no generally accepted agreement as to what thought is or how it is created. Thoughts are the result or product of either spontaneous or willed acts of thinking. Because thought underlies many human actions and interactions, understanding its physical and metaphysical origins, processes, and effects has been a longstanding goal of many academic disciplines including psychology, neuroscience, philosophy, artificial intelligence, biology, sociology and cognitive science.


I asked you which word holds more power and then I defined them for you to consider. Many school aged children struggle with test scores in regards to reading comprehension. Is it any wonder that there should be a struggle when the greatest minds read and read and still do not know with any absolute certainty?

“Because thought underlies many human actions and interactions, understanding its physical and metaphysical origins, processes, and effects has been A LONG STANDING GOAL.


“When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.”

History repeats itself as to tell us that it can not be repeated or the goal will not be reached. How many of us long to change the way that things are and yet we wake up to ground hog day. A day in the life of the same thing over and over and over because we all have responsibility and life is the way that it is. I have a friend who loves the outdoors to the extent of wanting to give up all of his worldly possessions so that he can pit himself against nature. He longs to see if he can survive the wild because he is surviving just fine in civilization and it feels a lot like slow death. I will hate to see him go, but he should. I do not believe he will survive it. I believe he will die doing what he loves and I do not know the quickness of that end. He is still too captured by historical mistakes to recognize his own future.

brain gif

What is stopping us from letting go of all that we do not wish to hold onto?


If I was dropped alone in the center of a dense forest, alone to my ideas and wild element, what would I need to do first to ensure I would live to see another day of uncertainty? And then could I ever be happy with uncertainty when the result could be my premature demise? I don’t want to die young, but I do not want to live dead. My thought is my collective reasoning of ideas nearly forty decades long, and introspective, I am introspective.

I am his future and I am yours if you see yourself like me. I am the voice that speaks of freedom and change in world that holds plenty of time without enough direction. I meet a whole lot of people who are looking for something, reaching for something, and yet who even knows how to get started. “YES! I want a change.

I need a change. Please tell me that this is NOT my life. I do not want my life to be like this and yet it is. My life is what it is and it will always be that way.”

“Is” and “Not” If your life is not then what would you have it be?

who am I

There is a term I recently became familiar with. It is called BRAIN DUMP. If I am to explain it in the simplest form I will tell you that all you need is a piece of paper and a pen. You will sit in front of that paper and you will write every thought that is in your head onto the paper and if you are not a writer you will make a simple list. If you do not know how to start a list because your mind is asking for a topic let yourself pick one and then open yourself up to clear the register. DUMP every idea that comes. Do not worry about the order as it is more an exercise to express release.

Our heads are too full of history and it is impeding progress. I am devoted to personal growth and on my quest I too have set impossible goals. I have a goal to build a multi-million dollar company and it sometimes feels impeded because on down days it seems that I am lacking any assets that I can cash into the product I set to acquire which is money.


I need to make more than millions now that I am three years in and mired in research. I am finding people by Google search, the most profound thinkers that have the innovation by knowledge to restart time. I am reading about reality that makes global health and unity a tangible and readily available existence.


My now, this now, at 10:19 am on Sunday March… I have no idea what day it is but the year is 2015. I need to make a BRAIN DUMP TO DO LIST FOR TODAY because in order for me to succeed I will need to take action. If you would like to take action you are welcome to. It’s really as simple as making a list. Dump and you just might trade trash for treasure.

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