Dear Tracy Benson,

Of course I will pull my pants down for you! I wish that my bum didn’t have so many lumps but I have been eating a lot of sugar. I think the sweets I have been eating coagulated in my rump in the form of sugar cubes. When I sit down the extra weight I have gathered in my rear has no place to go so it spreads out like wings beside me on my chair. It is the weirdest phenomenon to be sharing a seat next to my own ass. When I run my fingers down my back it reaches a shelf of squish at that place where booty meets chair. I can put my hands on it and rock back and forth. It’s body that feels separate than me…

I am not a size.

I have fun with this body of mine. My current shape is squish. I am wonderful to snuggle with except that my boyfriend can’t quite get close when we spoon because my booty is in the middle of monstrosity. Baby got back to eating biscuits with sausage gravy and yes, I would like an extra side of hash browns with bacon. Let’s have wine at breakfast and call it Sunday church. This year for lent I gave up restraint…

Do you know how YUMMY love is!! and lazy is the snuggle…

Someone asked me recently if my recent weight gain is because I am hiding some secret depression. No. My recent weight gain is because I was bored with being fit. It took a lot of energy and these days mine is spent in front of the computer creating art by memories. My nights are spent with Joshua, Sapphire, and Kai. We lay around and watch TV eating snacks. True story. Poor example?

Perhaps.

Have you heard of the company BEACHBODY Tracy? The company CEO Carl Daikeler never replies to any or my questions or comments. I feel slighted because he ignores me and replies to other people.

His company teaches people like you and me how to make money by inspiring them through fitness. There is also money to made in direct selling through his company- You may have heard of http://www.shakeology.com/en_US/?code=SEMB_SHK_GOOGLE

Will you do me a favor Tracy Benson. Will you message Carl Daikeler and tell him he should follow my blog. I would be SO GRATEFUL :))))) You can even forward him the link to make it easy.

My original plan was to write to inspire people to know that they can achieve their fitness and health goals without the gimmicks of products, supplements, and merchandising. Our health is a personal product of choice. How many of you out there are making choices you wish you didn’t need to. I call mine SACRIFICE and it usually feels like blood spilled loss. My dad says, “Life is hard. You better be tougher.” I meet truly happy people and I think there is something wrong with them. I feel like I am on ‘The Walking Dead’ and I finally made it to the “safe” compound….

You found my blog on BODYBUILDING.COM Tracy Benson. Maybe they will hire me as a writer?

My photography business will provide for me well if I give it what it took last time. You will see how my body is changing as I am now focused on life as it was back when I was successful behind the lens…

I promised that this time I would do it differently. This time my business will be built with HEALTH as the foundation. Thank you Tracy Benson for reminding me. Welcome to the gift of DAY ONE. We are in the together. YES! You can follow my daily fitness and motivation blog. www. asmilelikeyours.com

At the top of my website there will be the page header, “HELP WITH FAT SHAMING”. I chose this title for my journey because I really do think it is a shame I can’t eat everything all the time. I would snatch a donuts away from a starving Ethiopian child. I love to eat. It is not depressing. It is shameful.

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